Two Mega-stories from today's field work.

Story the First
I arrived to work in the field at 7am (this is Sunday, just to set the mood). It's Father's Day, the 10th one since my Dad passed. I parked the car, and looked out at the rain. It was thick. I started making up the data forms for the day, and kind of zoned into my uber-depressing mental state of overthought, as one can do when solo in the field...

I thought about the previously mentioned C-Hill friends, two of whom had not responded yet to my offer of 'one last all-u-can-eat-mussels night' that I had left yesterday....which could mean they're ignoring me...which means they may be pissed I left semi-abruptly at the going-away-party last weekend [I had my reasons, mainly in the form of the ex getting snuggly with a new beau, blatantly in front of me].
I thought about the project that I had now worked a month straight on (including nights and weekends) and still may not get done in a satisfactory timeframe [having been pushed back 2 months by the lawyers and managers (each making several times what I do) fine tuning the wording of a pointless contract] I thought of the overtime I had to put in, yet was still making less than many of my cohorts who dropped the job at 5pm.
I thought of the poison ivy rash on my hands...not many other jobs that will expose you to such awful allergens on a daily basis.
I thought about being cold and miserable for the entire 'day of rest'.
I though of the general unfulfillingness of my current life phase.
 
I sighed and opened the passanger side door and clamoured over the seat [my driver's side door doesn't open]. The rain came down hard. As I opened the back of the truck, the rain suddenly petered out, and stopped altogether. I looked up in amazement at the overcast. One thought rang in my head 'it's father's day, and there's only one guy I know who knows the crap of working in miserable conditions off the clock because "the job has to be done."' Tears welled up. The forecasted rain held up until I was done the day in the field. Happy Father's Day, Dad.

Story the Second
It has oft been joked, that, as my curreny project is surveying the scrub lands on the south shore of Brooklyn, I am destined to find a dead body. Ha ha ha...

Today I stumbled across a dead body. Of a dog (or some such other canine predator). BUT, it was extensively decayed (only bones and a few pieces of skin remained), partially covered, and I didn't see the skull or much of the limbs when I first spotted it. All I saw were the sholder blades and vertebrae, which are VERY similar to a human's. And it was a big dog. So for the first minute, I did think I had found a human body.

I was surprisingly calm when I saw it, thinking 'oh god, it's a body...an actual human body.' I thought immediately to call the police, but how to describe it 'I'm in marine park, about 800' East of the Paedergat Bridge, and about 50' in from the curb...you'll have to exit and drive along the walkway for...', thought of the horrible things that must have happened, became slightly nauseated by the odor and image (all sorts of bugs too). I, out of biologist's instinct (but also some morbid curiosity), moved the mugwort away from the skull (looking both for confirmation of the species, and also maybe looking for a cause of death). The teeth were of a carnivore, so I sighed a small breath of relief that it was 'only a dog'. But then I felt bad all over again. What happened to the dog? Who could do this? Did it just run away, or did someone actually kill it out here. Regardless, it was not a situation to get the police involved anymore. I'll call the park authorities about it tomorrow.

With that, now to power nap before data entry.

I am most definately moving this summer. Likely within a mile, just to my own place. I have reached a point where I will forgo other luxuries just to be rid of roomates. Not that my current roomates aren't the best I've had, but they still will dominate the kitchen, still will potentially be watching reruns when I bring a date home to 'watch a movie,' and there's just a background level of stress to keep the volume down or moderate my behaviour, even when I'm home. 
Currently, one of them has a friend over, and they are dominating the common space (plus I can hear them far too clearly in my room).  While we get along, we're not buddy-buddy. They don't augment the life experience at all. I don't begrudge them, in fact they're great, but they are people I have to share with.

However, while my neighbourhood is doubtless the best for me, I want to move further. The social scene in the Clinton Hill 'hood has fallen considerably for me, largely due to the fact that the people I know here are/were mutual friends with myself and Kathleen, and while they profess to want to continue being both our friends, Kath's hard-line zero-contact-with-exs policy forces them to choose which to invite, and they have invited me to one event in the past three months since Kath and I broke (which Kath was at, besides, which is a whole 'nother rant aside that! - needless to say I'll always love her, but she really can be an inconsiderate $*%^).

So my C-Hill friends have downgraded themselves, whilst my band-friends left for Astoria long ago. They miss me, and I them. Perhaps it is time to follow, but Astoria is so retirement-village, and far from any real nightlife. Plus I have recently begged off one of the Astoria crew who wanted to date me...awkward! Plus my job has almost fully shifted to south Brookly (the opposite direction from Astoria), and doubling the commute is a really bad idea.

Of course, my job continues to get more frustrating and not deliver on promises of increased compensation, so maybe it's time to pull up from NYC altogether. I have obtained the 'project manager' title that was the goal since I started nearly 2 years ago, but all that comes with it is frustration and extra work. It was supposed to be power and pay raises, but there has been zero benefit so far.

It's 7:45am. I slept 2 hours last night, and I feel guilty about it. The data entry I said I'd have done by now is still nowhere near done. I predict at least 3 panicked phone calls from my supervisors this morning, maybe one will relate to this data, the others will be sudden 'emergencies' borne of someone else's unpreparedness, a client's illogical request, or another stupid loophole in the paper trail that nullifies the 10 hours of Hercule Poirot-ing I've done to figure out this company's internal paperwork. I haven't had a actual day off since May 17 [it was great, yes]. The people I know on Unemployment only make about $200-300 less than I do per month.

Blerg. Two more weeks of this, then I'm taking a long-long weekend.

The previous date went smashingly. A great evening with a girl I further realized I was crazy about, ending with a long goodnight kiss.

Unfortunately, I got an email today from said girl telling me that 'we weren't the right fit.'

I fully believe it was my cynicism that cost me that relationship.  A cynicism borne of being surrounded by such behaviour for the past decade or so. I don't really know who I am anymore, but I intend to start peeling the layers back, lay me bare, and see which ones still make sense  Pardon the upcoming behavioural irregularities. Some will be temporary. Others will hopefully be permenant. [and, again, pardon the sudden serious tone]

I have a 2nd date tonight with a girl I very much like, but developed a poison ivy rash over the weekend. It's on my face and arms, the two areas of skin that will be exposed at dinner.

Le sigh.

I blew nigh a week's paycheck yesterday, paying a stubhub scalper for a ticket to the Paul McCartney/Ringo Starr reunion on Saturday. I weighed it outit, figured it was a once-in-a-lifetime event, and I had the money (living below one's means can pay off), and pulled the trigger. It pissed me off that I had to pay so much, as I was dillegently at my computer thje second the tickets went on sale, to no avail. But it will be an absolutely legendary night.

A week ago, I had just returned from another legendary concert, Great Big Sea with Spirit of the West. When I heard that these two would be playing on the same night, I drove up to Montreal to catch the closest show to NYC. And it didn't dissapoint. I saw 'The Crawl' (the definitive North Vancouver song!) performed 5000 km from home! Plus an encore of both bands taking the stage to do a couple of songs together! Plus the general awesomeness of Montreal! Good beer, great food, absinthe, smarties, culture, laid back kattitude...

I have scored a major boon at work: Project Manager for an upcoming arborist project. Which, all things being karmic, should include an official promotion and raise - not to mention massive amount of power [plus 6 years of straight guaranteed work]! I'm looking forward to having a little more control over my hours. Work has had a habit of beating overtime out of me when I really needed to be doing other things.

Like tonight, which was the first day in forever that I had an evening free. I was able to do some needed cleaning, and actually had the time and resources to cook a good meal (my time usually in short supply, and my roomate usually dominating the kitchen; I am oft forced to get take-out) and have time for both relaxation and personal maintenance. Is this what the typical 9-5-er gets EVERY DAY? No wonder everybody else seems so functional...I look forward to it!

So little in life is constant these days. My job swings wildly, and social relationships are all in bursts.

I spent nearly a month and a half straight in the office (literally straight over the past two weeks to make a bumped-up deadline), now, I probably won't set foot in the office 'til April - tending instead to daily fieldwork in the outer boros. With this comes regular use of my truck, which has been largely un-used over the past month.

I saw several friends last Thurs that I realized I hadn't seen in nearly a month. I used to see them all the time, but the transport distance seems to just be too much to 'just hang'. Many other friends are seen only every couple of weeks. Tho' at least the time spent is of high quality.

Goddamn, I want a drummer more than air.

I currently am the ruling Steward of the Ecology Department at work. Mostly due to the fact that everyone senior to me got to go to the Bahamas this week (for a research project). I wanted desperately to go, but someone had to stay behind to hold the fort. Unfortunately, I'm not in the office to transform our section into the coolest row of cubicles evar! Plus, all it takes is one fuddy-duddy to not appreciate the awesomeness of my redecoration, to get me in trouble. Bleh.

1. Was going okay on cutting back on useless crap, until the combo of a 10-hour delayed 'til cancelled flight, and an underwhelming raise threw me into unproductive doldrums. Still working on it.

2. Finally got to the gym after a hectic week of work and personal bullshit. Scheduled to go again on Tues (may sneak in on Mon just for the cardio).

3. The underwhelming raise @ work (it was promised to be a double-raise, instead it was a standard). This emphasizes the need fo rinter-personal force. I was advised to 'let other people handle it', well, other people done fucked up and I am the one who's left making significantly less. I will be taking this up with the boss when he's in this week.

4. I'm moral enough.

New Year's Resolutions [not terribly exciting, but I feel I have to write them somewhere]
1. 90% reduction in cultural detritus.
This is specifically aimed at websurfings like fark, facebook, imdb and pretty much anthing that invests time without widening the depth and breadth of the life experience/personal development. [I'm somewhat violating that by taking the time to write this, but that's why I said '90%'].

2. Gym becomes a priority
No longer a 'if I'm doing nothing else' , gym time will take priority over all but the most vital after-work activities.

3. Increased inter-personal force
Many of the great unhappinesses in life were allowed to develop by my not being forceful when other people were slacking in a way that actively screwed me. Upon realizing a negative condition, it will be dealt with immediately and without sugar-coating. People also deserve, in general, to be dealt with immediately.

4. Revert moral sensibilities
I've been slipping, from a moral point-of-view, for years now (blame NYC, but I blame personal exhaustion). I don't feel good about it.

Continued progress in: environmental consciousness, vegetarianism, evil.

I arrived home last Saturday, full of the promise of a 2-week holiday with friends and family in my hometown. In the week since then, there has been a total of about 6 hours when the snow subsided enough to get away from the house. I have taken to shoveling the driveway, even when it didn't need it, to get some blood flowing (and get a reprieve from the family dynamic within).

Xmas was pretty lame. The power went out on Christmas eve, and wasn't restored 'til nearly noon on Christmas Day. Candles and fireplaces were used, but it failed to create an 'old tyme Christmas' atmosphere. Xmas dinner was scaled back as people couldn't make the trip - it was with but the same 4 people I'm snowed in with (mom, bro, and sis-in-law), and we didn't even move into the dining room (from the less-grand kitchen table).

Gifts received were extrodinarily lame. Every actual package I unwrapped was clothing (a sweater that was far too frat-boy for me, and a package of underwear - I swear to Zuul - my own mother gave me, on my 31st Christmas, a pack of underwear). [to those who don't know, I actually have a good number of good-quality and good-condition boxer-briefs, and my mom has not been in a position to assess this collection for years] 

The rest of the gifts were cash, which makes sense, honestly. It's less fun to unwrap, but at this stage in life, all gifts have to be transported back to NYC on a plane, and my main focus is saving enough to put a downpayment on property. Yes, the market's good right now, but I haven't got the capital, nor am I in a position where I can say 'here is where I want to live for long enough to bother buying a place'

And that pretty much establishes the mood of the past year. No relevations really - I live and work in the same place I did in 2007. Not even a promotion or an exciting new project. No earthshaking experiences either -  past a February drive to Cape Cod and a week returning to the roots in B.C.'s Caribou. The band didn't progress, spending 3/4 of the year getting the new drummer up to speed, and the last 1/4 trying to find a new one. My last grandparent passed away, but she had had advanced Alzheimers for years, and hadn't really been there for a while. Perhaps the only significant changes were (a) a increased probability that I'll be wearing 'professional clothes' at any time, and (b) the loss of about 15 lbs from the midsection.

But there is hope in the new year. There are possible projects to lead @ work.  Though being at work long enough for those to start depends if they come through with the double-raise I have been promised. [Last year's promised raise fell through cuz the admin people got distracted with selling the company. I know it's not one person's fault, but collectively, it's an insult that demands some reparations.] The band will be recording, cuz either we find a full-time drummer in the next week, or we'll pay a merc to do the bloody album the rest of us have been ready for for three years.

Anyways, too long already...more musings later.

The client had me transfixed for a 5 hour, 14 minute conference call today. As mentally blasted as I was going into the fourth hour, it was probably the least frustrating aspect over the past few days. Between more bullshit parking ticket and medical billing screwups, the fact that I could shut the world out for a few hours to concentrate on a single task (even one as scalp-rending as this project) was somewhat comforting.

The medical billing screwup is a classic. It means that, despite ever-increasing premiums, I haven't been able to visit a doctor without a billing fuck-up resulting in having a bill sent to me months later (for charges I was 100% covered for) since roughly 2004. And this one was super-good cuz the visits were over a year ago, so it's not like I have those records on file anymore. I am definately a fan of the Canadian system. One card, show it at the desk, sign here, you're fucking covered and we'll deal with it from here.

With the fam. visiting me in BK, I had access to their hotel's swank gym. As such, I'm back on the fitness bandwagon (picking up with my public gym after they left). I really wish the schools around here weren't such prisons, because the school across the street from me has a rubberized track that I can't access because the fences don't open. I feel FAC-ing horrible for the kids tho', imagine not being able to get out of school AT ALL from 9-3. Ugh. This is not the place to raise a kid.

Brrr-ing my fac-ing ass off today. It's not winter until my toes go numb within the first hour of field work.

I have come to discover that many great things in this city are free. I mean besides love and peace. Today, the NFT (Not For Tourists) guide had an open bar and free guide giveaway. I got a $6 drink and $17 book for free! Combine with 'pay what you want' museums and plenty of other events (a Brooklyn College open house a few weeks back was entertaining and got me drunk for free!), there is much to get if you look.

The best, tho', was probably last Monday, when I hauled gear for the wedding band, who were playing an NYPD Xmas party @ the Grand Hyatt on 42nd St. I got free drinks, 5-star food and dessert, and $80 in my pocket for only a couple of hours of work. Whee! 

Still, I wants my bailout!

Today, I woke at 5:30 in order to complete a tree survey before going into the office. I was able to walk to the survey site (living in BK may suck in many ways, but the commute's a breeze vs. my various bosses' 90+min commutes). In the air still chilled by a November eve, my damp hair making me sensitive to the bitter wind. I took out my notebook and recorded the measurements largely derived from known lengths of my body parts (shoe length = 13" heel-to-heel pace = 3'). I took some 'baseline' pictures and recorded the last observation and shut the book as a flock of pigeons past by.

I walked to the subway, and enjoyed a seat on the subway during rush hour. Getting to the office at 8, I took out the same notebook as I entered the boss' office to learn of the daily emergency associated with the Navy project. I opened the notebook in his office to find an unexpected yellow-brown substance on the facing pages.
"Huh," I commented to my boss, "Must be some pitch from the tree."
I scratched at the substance, and found it crumbled easily, and had many hard , dark flecks.
"Well," my boss commented, smiling a grin rarely evident in the office, "You hope it's pitch."
His tone was absentminded, but it immediately dawned on me that it wasn't pitch. It wasn't plant-based at all. Oh, it was organic! And it was a thick organic fluid excreted onto my page. It, indeed, was bird shit. Perfectly timed and placed by the passing doves of Brooklyn, into the closing pages of my notebook, to lie in wait until I would open it at a most inopportune time, and have to stand there for 15 minutes, discussing the various aspects of the project, all the while silently screaming that I needed to get to some soap and clean my shitty fingers.

The rest of the day was fine, thank you!

My ma, bro, and sis-in-law are visiting next week. Gonna do the town (tix to August: Osage County) n' have my first family 'US Thanksgiving'. It's also full-swing opera season, with 3 in the next month (Madama Butterfly this Weds, then Queen of Spades and Don Giovani in early Dec). Then a full 2-week Xmas break which will involve skiing, and may involve a road trip to Vegas.

I had a good end-of-year review at work (before the birdshit incident). The only negatives being the occasional typo and a need to shave more often.

Need a drummer again, if anybody in NY/NJ knows of a decently compentent and sane drummer.

My car CD player recently jammed. My 'Best of The Who' may be stuck in limbo forever! My DVD player also has mysteriously not been working for a while. But these pale in comparison to my PS3 suddenly refusing to boot up. Gawddammit, there's no way that's going to be an easy fix.

I got denied access to my co-worker's BDay party tonite cuz I didn't fit the dress code. I had  been moving my friend Forde (in Hoboken), and wasn't able to get home to change, so I showed up to the party location in short-shorts (khaki cargos) and a slightly dingy T-shirt. It seems my coworker's a classy dame who has parties at Greenwich Village joints with 'no shorts' dress codes. I wanted to cause I scene with the snooty doormen, but upon being told 'there's a dress code', I paused for the beat, and said 'Well, fuck it then' and went on my way. I am somewhat proud of the sitch, as I had been fearing that I had been progressively selling out more, and now I feel somewhat vindicated that I 'don't fit in with your namby-pamby pretty boy image cuz I've been accomplishing too much, so I leave you to your cover charges and absurd drink prices'.
 
But I'm pained now in that I figured I'd just go home and watch movies/play PS3, and now it seems that I can't! ARgh!

Good news: I got my car back, it was a mere $46 spot weld on a bracket. Beauty.

Bad news: in the next 72 hours, I got a ticket and was in an accident.

The ticket pissed me off enough, because I got into a poor situation in which it was much safer to disregard the 'left only' paint and go through the intersection. The cops got me, and it appears that it's $90. I had tried to get over, but it was dark and left lane turns into a row of travelling cars after dark sucks in a pickup.

Anyways, that's now water under the bridge after I got hit this afternoon. I had just parked a block down from my place, and was gathering my stuff, when a car comes lurching forward, stops, then lurches right into the side of my car. The car backs up, I assume he's pulling over for ye olde insurance-trade. Instead, he looks at me and speeds off. I am flabbergasted, and seem to have nothing but a bunch of slack-jawed yokels peering in my windows as he does this. I was able to get his licence number, which is good cuz no one else did. I asked the car who was double-parked in front of me if I could have his phone number as a witness. He immediately threatened me with violence, saying 'I ain't no snitch', further threatening me if I wrote down his licence plate number. Wonderful. Obviously a friend of the perp. It took a seven-year-old kid to have the maturity to give me his plate number.
Anyways, I filed a report with the cops and the insurance, gave them both the licence number. Hopefully the kid (or more likely, his parents), will be getting a few phone calls this evening. Which is good, cuz now my car door doesn't open, and I am feeling particularly vindictive toward this young fella and his likely accomplice.

Regardless, I'm feeling a little sour towards Brooklyn right now. Mayhaps its time to move to a more civilized clime with a longer commute.

That VP nom's speech was kind of fun. Some of it interesting, much of it dumb. I got nearly nauseous when she assured the crowd that Alaska's North Bank should be drilled mercilessly for oil, followed by a crowd chant of 'Drill It!'. I have never seen such a complex ecological and economical issue summed up in such a moronic way. That's the kind of attitude that causes 'shock and awe' type bombings where they weren't needed, even if there had been a shred of evidence beforehand.

That said, fuck all parisan morans. I'm turning off my TV for the next two months. I'm unable to  vote, and faith in politicians is akin to... to... I can't think of a metaphor, but it's a really dumb thing to do. I'll check in once in a while to watch the human race continue it's downwards spiral.

Yesterday was a good day. Mostly due to dropping into the bank to deposit a check, and being whisked away to the back room to be told of all sorts of wonderful bank programs I now qualified for. It made me feel rich. Jah, I'm still living in poverty conditions, but my bank account looks okay...kind of...should be better if I ever want to do something extravagant like get my own place.

Today, I received the job that I dream of. I got an address to do a tree survey at, and it was right across the street from San Loco in W'burg. So I logged some 'overtime' to do a minimal amount of work while dragging my coworkers along to San Loco and Duff's. Lovely! And now I have to sober up because I have to move my truck due to alternate-side parking. BULLSHIT!

I am proved wrong. I had someone start a conversation with me in NYC public that wasn't asking for money or personal info. Actually, i still get to be right, its just that we no longer have an absolute trend. Some nice lady couldn't figure out the subwauy turnstiles, and asked me about it. Yay!

My truck may be in its last days. There's a knocking-scrape come from the rear wheels, at the same time that the oil leak flared back up. Combined, I'm naive to think it the bill to fix them will be less than the value of the truck. But, I spent a ton of money to fix the rear suspension and a previous oil leak just over a year ago. Beh. If it's done, I won't get a new one until January (I need it much less for work 'til then). I will be able to live the winter not worrying about parking problems, which is just fine by me.

To Maryland tomorrow...minimalistic conditions in which to drink heavily. Hoorah!

I'm on the tail end of one of the most grueling shifts since 1999. In getting a report out the door, I have slept about 6 hours over the past 2 days, and have spent around 35 of the past 48 hours in the office. Upon this 1100+ page monstrosity, I am considered a minor contributor, and I will not be given many accolades.

I'm tired, I'm beat, and I still ain't got a raise, nor do I get to charge overtime on any of that.

Bitch bitch bitch...whine whine whine.

You know the homeless people that I really feel sorry for? The ones that insist on giving a 2-minute speil about why they need your money.  I guess they think they're investing in a sure thing. But I end up feeling bad for being nice (as in, I let them go on, and I don't stop them immediately to tell them not to bother). The average homeless guy gets to the point immediately, and doesn't spend more than 5 seconds in asking. But these guys want to let it go on and on. I always feel bad (well, not always, sometimes the beggars are dressed better than I am), but I feel worse for letting them waste their time. Maybe if I actually did give money, I wouldn't feel so bad. But between the frequecy of the requests and what I usually sense is a high level of bullshit, it makes more sense to donate to a cause that would help them. But I'd rather donate to an environmental cause...damn. 
Also, it does get on my nerves. I try to be compassionate, but in the past year, 98% of the people who strike up conversations with me on the street are people who want money [the other 2% are people trying to get me to register for their political party - who are even more annoying...let me vote the fucking way I want to - except I can't vote in the US, so haha, no blood on my hands]. Regardless, I admit to becoming very New Yorker in that I treat bums with a little less manners than I should, just because it happens so often.

Anyways...sleep on it. Sweet sleep.

So, tonight I sang one song with the wedding/party band that I haul gear for. This is dangerous to my 'artistic integrity', as I'm an original musician, and this is essentially a cover band [a very good one, with a previous history of original tunes that they dropped when their gravy train ran out], which should be rightfully frowned upon.

The absolutely fucked up thing about it was that I looked at the crowd whilst singing, and there were a good 300-400 people, many of whom were dancing, singing along ('Satisfaction' by the Stones), and just generally giving a shit-load of appreciation during and after the song. Now, I, of course, loved it, but this is in stark contrast to 90% of the original shows I've played that I put way more effort into. 
If it wasn't the largest crowd I've ever sung to, it's in the top 3, and one of the most energetic, save a couple of mosh-pitted shows. After many of my original shows, I'm downright depressed, because I worked my ass off to play to only a few people, and all I get for my invested time, sweat, and skill is a pissed off club owner who will never deal with us again. This situation seemed to be 'show up, the crowd will be here shortly'.

So, I have to keep my hold on my soul, and not sell out. 
...but jeez, it is fun to play in those conditions (once I turned off the anti-tool device in my brain), and I know that the cover band usually rakes in $5K per show (Pale Horse's average payday is about $50), and they have don't have to haul their  gear, cuz they can afford their own roadie [me, who makes more hauling their gear than he does managing, promoting, hauling, and singing for his own band].

Bah, enough whining. I'm going to sleep...work awaits on the other side, but it should be bearable now that the heatwave is subsiding.

Christ, where did the last six months go?

Anyways, we are coming up to the 1-year anniversary of my professional career, a time when I promised myslef that I would assess my life situation to see if moving on (likely back to the PacNW) would be the best path to take.

Now, how happy I am with my life seems to vary wildly. On any given evening (including many Fridays), I'll be content as a clam, enjoying luxuries and great company; then I realize that it's 11pm, and I have to be up in 7 hours to go out in whatever hostile environs to do a job that is, at the best of times, mundane, and at the worst, downright maddening. But the ends are what I want to do...it's just that the means can suck.

I'll look at my bank account, and realize that there's a comfortable amount there; until I talk to many of those around me, and everybody seems to be scoring big raises to pay scales I can't fathom. But wait, don't I have a graduate degree, a professional position, and put in a ton of extra hours in a complex and in-demand field? I am living free of serious financial worry, so I shouldn't complain...should I?

I look at the living conditions. NYC is exciting, with many, many unique and awesome things to see and do! But it is also very crowded with assholes, and the modal personality is much more asshole-ish. For what I'm paying for my very humble apartment (shared with 2 roomates in a meh corner of town), I could probably have my own place in a much more hospitable environment nearly anywhere else in the world. Not to mention my love of open spaces...there's very little in Brooklyn, and they're all over the place in Vancouver.

I look to friends, I have great friends on both sides [tho', admittedly, the longer friends are stronger friends]. PacNW has my family, of which I remind myself daily that I am ignore far too much.

And then there's the ladies...the sweet, sexy ladies...ohhhhhh yeah.

Anyways...there's that, and many other things to think about...think, think, think.

...think.